Glenn's Weekly Motivational-The Kindness Tree

September 24, 2019

Photo courtesy of Glenn Anderson Entercom Radio

It wasn’t a good weekend for the Anderson family.

From the time we woke up on Saturday, the stage had been set. Everyone seemed to have a problem with one another. The kids were exceptionally mean towards one another, pushing each other’s buttons. This naturally set the tone for Steph and I, and soon we were reacting to all the chaos and joining right in with the negativity. It was apparent that we were failing miserably as parents and needed specialized classroom instruction stat . The tone, the selfishness, the fighting. We all were to blame and I mentally had to check out for my own sanity. And so I did. Retreating into the bathroom numerous times for no other purpose than to turn on the fan, lock the door, and spend some time with my friend Mr. Instagram so I could see everyone else's perfect lives.

It all came to a head at dinner. The bickering, the complaining, and the expression on my face told the table I was mentally on a beach in the Caribbean and Steph began to cry. Any of you that have kids know that when mom cries, it’s the children’s due diligence to join right in. So now, the arguing had switched over to uncontrollable sobbing like all 3 kids found out the ending of The Notebook simultaneously.

And I began to cry. Crying because WE can’t figure it out. Crying because I can’t figure it out. Exhausted and failing as a parent.

My son Cooper excused himself from the non-stop bedlam and went to his room with some markers. A short time later, he returned to the table with the picture below.

“It’s a kindness tree,” he said. “We all need to stop yelling at one another and fill it up”

And so we did. As hard as it was to find anything redeeming about anyone in that moment, when the dust settled, we began filling it up.

At that moment, I realized that maybe we’re not that bad at the parenting thing, just having a bad day.

Stop getting down on yourself. Allow yourself to have bad days or even weeks and if it lasts longer than that, there is no shame in counseling. We did it.

Realize that kids are the greatest imitators whether you want them to be or not. If you have tone with your spouse, your kids will have tone with you.

One kind gesture is sometimes all it takes for someone to emotionally surrender. Keep that in mind with all of your relationships.

And..invest in a loud bath fan. There are multiple reasons why this will pay for itself over and over.

Take care and all my best as you figure out your relationships xo Glenn